Journal with Carrie: Day 2

“Describe a time when you felt particularly loved or valued”

Having Arron in my life makes me feel loved. Before we got together, people used to tell me all the time that I was fat and ugly (apparently they couldn’t come up with something creative). I used to believe it and I started to compare myself to every girl that I saw in such a negative way that my self-confidence in how I looked was practically non-existent. I didn’t feel good about myself and it was quite damaging. When Arron came along and reverted every negative thing that was said about me into something positive, I started to believe that I wasn’t what people had told me before. I had someone who wanted me in their life and was willing to prove to me that what I had been told before wasn’t true. I am not saying that I am the most beautiful person in the world because I’m not. What I am saying is that I felt loved because if Arron didn’t think I was ugly, then that is all that matters to me.

It took me a long time to believe him though. I had 3 years of having people look at me then laugh and people calling me names, that I took such a long time to let Arron’s words sink in. He didn’t give up though when I was being stubborn and wouldn’t listen to him. He could have walked away and joined everyone else; claiming that I was a lost cause. He didn’t. Whenever I think about it, it makes me smile as his opinion matters the most to me. I don’t care if the rest of the world calls me the most hideous person in the world; if Arron thinks I’m more than that, I will believe him.